It all starts with a conversation…

Being that today was the first day of a creative writing course, I thought I would try something a little different. So I am going to think about the impact of everything I have learnt today on my evening. First of all I wished to discuss some ideas and found a way to explore, finding a possibly very important connection in terms of my career ambitions. As today was the first time I had ever read TimeOut magazine, I felt a duty to act on the information that I had discovered about London. So I decided I would go to the Oxford Street Christmas lights switch on, despite my fairly Scrooge outlook on Christmas. I decided to go, despite the fact that the people I attempted to persuade to go with me had been uninterested. I remained inspired to fall back in love with a city that had been so cold for me and a time that had been hard previously. So off I set into the rainy and gloomy London evening, stopping all to quickly upon arrival at a couple of my favourite stores before reaching the underground station. The importance of these being that H&M always allows me to fondly remember my time in Sweden and Urban Outfitters is a place of calm and creativity for me. The clothes inspiring new outfits, events and occasions; the books inspiring new ideas, topics and areas for further exploration; the music allowing me to discover the unknown yet always feel comfortable and able to vibe with whatever is playing.

Finally leaving Camden, I set off for Tottenham Court Road station and continued an ongoing search for a black cardigan. The search is as yet still unsuccessful, however my walk was not. I find something extremely defiant about walking in the rain as though I am making a point to myself and others, that the rain need not change your walk; it can be just as purposeful, meaningful, steady and insightful. I like to walk as though the rain is a friend, showering me with gifts. I like to look around, as I would do on any other walk and not be tempted to face the ground on my walk, but rather face the world. The world showed me a lot. It showed me that Harry Potter is still as big as when there were new books and films to look forward to. It showed me that the world is becoming more open, with a mixture of age, sexuality, ethnicity etc. exploring and embracing the Christmas shopping season. It showed me that old can become new again when I saw a Matalan on Oxford Street. Most prominently, it showed me that no evening is as dark and gloomy when the street is lit with Christmas lights.

Although my feet may be hurting, my smile is wide. I stepped out of my comfort zone, allowing myself to be open to the world. Ideas entered and passed through my mind with no part of me feeling out of place or overwhelmed. In fact, I found things that I can confidently say seemed right up my street. I felt satisfied from the salted caramel cookie dough to the dancing can’t touch this poo emoji as well as all the quirky gifts scattered around a variety of stores. If anything, all that I am left to feel now is a hope. A hope that this Christmas may be unlike the others. Walking round the stores I began to think of the perfect gifts for those who are important to me. I began to think that I would like to make an effort this year, because I have someone that I love and I have an idea of a project to begin working on that would be ideal for him. I am excited for a Christmas with the family I have lost touch with and the friends I have gained. I am even excited for the shopping, but more so for the looks on faces when presents are opened. After all, one thing that Christmas has always been about has been giving. Giving to those less fortunate, giving to those I care for most dearly and giving to those I wish to show my appreciation to as the end of the year approaches. I have never been all that excited for all the time off that families spend together or the mountain of gifts or the decorations. However, I have always been excited to bake the cakes and wrap the presents and make people laugh. So I have decided that this year, in order to cope with Christmas, I will not stuff myself with food or drown myself in alcohol, but instead focus on the good.

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