I have been thinking about the past. Not in an negative way, but in terms of memories. I have come to a point in life where I am a little lost and confused at times. So I think about how I got here and where I am going. I think of my family; how it is far from perfect. I think about how sometimes home can be a person, not a place. I think about where I am safe. I think about what I want; my hopes and dreams. Sometimes, it can be hard reflecting on the past if you do not feel particularly good about your now.
Nonetheless, I try to focus in on what happiness is and what made/makes me happy. It is a load of crazy moments and circumstances. I gave up on trying to push and change my life, at least in big ways, a long time ago. It just was not worth my time. I began to stop worrying and just let it all be. Life washes over you and it brings both the good and bad. I may sit here and cry about both, but if I was to relive it, I would not want to do anything differently. I have found my way back and am finding a balance.
I think about my centre: the things and people, that are important. I realise that I am exactly were I want and need to be. It may have taken time and it does not look like the perfect picture that I was expecting from what I have been shown my entire life.
However, I got to learn an important lesson. It is not as complex as you would expect and it comes from the film, Lilo and Stitch. Here is my favourite quote, ever. It tells you a hell of a lot about me and what is important. When I think of the memories, the people and the places, all I think of is this, because honestly it is still just as good as what anyone else has.
“This is my family.
I found it all on my own.
It’s little and broken, but still good.
Yeah – still good.”